An Indian wedding is not one day. It is a gathering of two families over four or five days, each with its own ritual, its own clothes and its own music. If you have been invited, or are joining a host family with us, here is what to expect.
The days of a wedding
Haldi. Turmeric paste is applied to the couple for blessing and glow, and usually to everyone nearby. Wear something you do not mind turning yellow.
Mehendi. An afternoon of henna, when intricate designs are painted on the hands of the bride and her guests. The darker the colour, the saying goes, the deeper the love.
Sangeet. A night of music and dance, where both families perform. You may be asked to join in, so a few steps learned in advance go a long way.
Baraat. The groom’s procession, often on horseback, with drums and dancing in the street.
The wedding. The couple take their vows around a sacred fire. It can be long, and guests come and go quietly; your host will tell you when the key moments arrive.
What to wear
Colour is welcome. Many families avoid white and black at weddings, and red is usually left to the bride. Saris, lehengas, kurtas and sherwanis are all appreciated, and nobody expects a guest from abroad to get every detail right.
Being a good guest
Greet elders first, accept food when it is offered, and do not worry about the schedule; things begin when they begin. A gift for the couple is customary, often an envelope of money, traditionally in an amount ending in one, such as 1,001 rupees, for luck.
Above all, say yes when you are pulled onto the dance floor.
